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Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by Rover the Sea on Mon Aug 15, 2011 11:29 am

What do you call a chicken wearing a shellsuit?



Spoiler:
An egg!!

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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by StLedge on Mon Aug 15, 2011 12:50 pm

The gay village in Manchester was burnt last night in a new riot. Police and firemen were on the scene as well as a cowboy, a construction worker and a red indian.
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by Rover the Sea on Mon Aug 15, 2011 2:07 pm

Heard the riots spread to Brighton too, many 'men' had their back doors smashed in!

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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by glosterrover on Mon Aug 15, 2011 8:52 pm

A woman was shopping in Asda when she spied an attractive young male assistant,feeling a bit Horny she asked him "would you help take my trolley to my car young man?"
"certainly Madam" he replied,while walking towards her car she said,
"i've got an itchypussy"
"That's no use to me Madam,all these Japanese cars look the same to me"
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by RTM08 on Sun Aug 21, 2011 2:44 pm

Not strictly a joke but this passage of emails is rather funny:

http://27bslash6.com/foggot.html
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by super_keith_andrews on Sun Aug 21, 2011 2:59 pm

A woman two KFC family buckets away from upsetting the planet's rotational axis.

lol!
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by glosterrover on Sun Aug 21, 2011 4:15 pm

That is pure Genius Laughing
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by DodgyGambit on Sun Aug 21, 2011 5:01 pm

Im not gonna read anymore posts in this thread

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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by super_keith_andrews on Sun Aug 21, 2011 5:15 pm

Why not?
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by DodgyGambit on Sun Aug 21, 2011 5:16 pm

cos I dont want to

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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by Willy on Sun Aug 21, 2011 5:19 pm

He's being a miserable basturk. Can't you tell from his posts in other threads? He'll perk up again once we reinstate Ince and beat United 4-2. Wink
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by glosterrover on Sun Aug 21, 2011 6:12 pm

That's him finished then Laughing
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by DodgyGambit on Sun Aug 21, 2011 6:22 pm

A little boy asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom,so she said yes. When he went to wipe his bum there was no toilet paper so he used his hands. When he got back to class his teacher asked, 'What do you have in your hand.'The boy said, 'A little leprechaun and if I open my hand he'll get scared away.'

He was then sent to the principals office and the principal asked him, 'What do you have in your hand.'

So the little boy said, 'A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he'll get scared away.' He was sent home and his mom asked him 'What do you have in your hand.'

So the little boy said, 'A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he'll get scared away.' He was sent to his room and his dad came in and said, 'What do you have in your hand.' So again the little boy said, 'A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he get scared away.'

Then his Dad got really mad and yelled, 'Open your hands!'

And the little boy said, 'Look Dad you scared the crap out of him.'

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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by glosterrover on Sun Aug 21, 2011 6:25 pm

Yayyy,he's back cheers
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by rob_of_the_robots on Sun Aug 21, 2011 6:26 pm

That was a crap joke.

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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by super_keith_andrews on Sun Aug 21, 2011 6:30 pm

Ew he didn't wash his hands. Skanky fucker.
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by Willy on Sun Aug 21, 2011 6:43 pm

I only wash my hands if my fingers go through the bogroll.
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by super_keith_andrews on Sun Aug 21, 2011 6:53 pm

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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by Roverdamus on Sun Aug 21, 2011 7:08 pm

Willy wrote:I only wash my hands if my fingers go through the bogroll.
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by glosterrover on Sun Aug 21, 2011 7:25 pm

Then buy better quality bog roll my good man Wink
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by Willy on Sun Aug 21, 2011 7:29 pm

Roverdamus wrote:
Willy wrote:I only wash my hands if my fingers go through the bogroll.

Or if the paper doesn't quite give enough surface coverage and you get some poo on your palm. I forgot to add that part earlier.

"Good quality" bogroll is the type that swells in the water and ends up giving you a plumbing nightmare. I'm not saying I use one-ply or anything, but that quilted shit is evil for drains. You may as well use a sheet of Bounty.
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by glosterrover on Sun Aug 21, 2011 7:31 pm

When that happens i just get the Butler to deal with the Drains Laughing
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by glosterrover on Fri Sep 09, 2011 4:43 pm

REMEMBER.......if you are in bed with a blind girl and she says yours is the biggest cock she has ever had....she's probably pulling your leg
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by RTM08 on Sun Sep 25, 2011 11:55 am

As my wife and I lay in bed together, I felt the tension in the air.

She then folded her arms and huffed, "You never make the first move."

"Jesus!" I said as I rolled my eyes. "Every night it's the same thing."

"Well you don't!" she moaned. "It's always me and quite frankly I'm fed up with it. And before you start, it's nothing to do with you being black."

"It is," I said.

"No, it isn't," she said.

"You know what?" I said as I jumped out of the bed. "You can stick the fucking chessboard up your arse."
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

Post by glosterrover on Sun Sep 25, 2011 6:38 pm

Laughing
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Re: Jokes, Jokes my kingdom for some Lemon Cheesecake

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